The moment I
entered Flamson Middle School’s football field and saw the stadium lights
radiate off of the grass on Aug. 28, some deep thoughts started to cloud my
head as I watched Clovis and Paso Robles kick off the football season.
I carry
those same thoughts as I type this out because this actually has been a weekend
full of emotions. I’m usually not one to talk about myself, especially since I
run a blog that puts student-athletes on a platform to get noticed, plus I spend
most of my hours talking about what’s going in the sports world.
But an array
of emotions engulfed me after that Clovis/Paso Robles game and the events that occurred
in the journalism world earlier this week. These emotions surfaced for a good
reason and has given me the reminder to love a great number of things.
I’ve endured
some turbulent times in the past year. Some people who I thought I was close to,
and who told me they were on my side, wound up trying to run me out from what I
loved to do and told me that I was no longer good enough. Then in December, I
finally found out what it was like to have a death nail hover over me, as I
started to lose movement in my joints and ligaments, lost my appetite and got
confined to a hospital bed. As tears flooded my eyes, I started wondering if I
had wrote my last story, evaluated my last prospect and if I had breathed my
last breath. My feeling was I had gotten ALS, which was the only virus I can
think of that gets everything in your body to shut down.
But through
prayers, encouragement from a wonderful group of people and a desire to get
back at doing what I loved, I got out of that hospital bed in a short span of
time. Still’s disease was what I received, which is nothing like ALS and is in
the arthritis family. While the disease remains inside of me, it never controls
me because I’ve learned how to combat it.
Clovis/Paso
Robles was my first game since being diagnosed with Still’s. That game gave me
the opportunity - and the honor - to help my colleagues at The Fresno Bee with providing updates. Plus that game got me to add new feature pieces to Cali Gold
Mine. More
important, the non-league battle was my first story in the aftermath of a
national tragedy.
I don’t know
anyone at WDBJ in Virginia. I didn’t know Alison Parker or Adam Ward. But I can
relate to them. Alison and Adam were in the same field I’m in. Their job was to
let their community know what’s going on. Their murders sent shockwaves across
the nation, and I felt those waves. Alison and Adam were just doing their
normal routine on the day they were taken away.
Their deaths
could’ve scared off anyone in the media field and tell people no one is safe.
But you know what? The football field and any sporting event will always be therapeutic
for me. I did what millions of journalists did after the WDBJ tragedy: went to
work and chased down stories, as a way to honor Alison and Adam plus prove that
evil will never, ever prevail.
This
industry isn’t an easy one regardless if you’re a freelance writer or TV
personality. As it is, one of my friends in Fresno received a racist message
recently. But I applaud him for shaking off that hater quickly and continued to
share the news to his community. I’ve dealt with my share of unstable people;
from coaches, parents trying to live through their kids, or hostile fans. But I
remind myself that there’s no better feeling in the world than to put out a
story or photo and see your name attached to it. Another awesome feeling is
looking around at your association, and realize you’re surrounded by people who
are on TV or writing for newspapers.
But what I
love the most – now more than ever – is the praise I get from others. From
Texas to California, I’m always honored when somebody shares my features and
tells me that they admire my quality of work. You people help drive me every day
to be the best version of myself. You’re the reason why CGM still exists and
why I continue to press on in this evolving industry.
To everyone
who has read my work over the years, I thank you. To everyone who has been
supportive since day one, sometimes ‘Thank You’ isn’t enough and you deserve a
hug from me.
A disease
and a disturbed former news reporter didn’t stop me from doing what I love. And
I’m glad the Virginia tragedy didn’t stop my media family.
Thanks and
God bless!